This weekend it's "Chill Out Weekend, All Weekend" on VH1, and a lot of the songs that are playing take me ages back and give me a very sad/happy feeling. You know, painful pleasure, pleasurable pain, that kind of thing. Then it hit me: I won't have another life ever again. I can't relive what is behind me, I can't accumulate years and I definitely can't pause life. And it saddened me to the bones that this is my only chance in life, the only offer I'll get, the only few decades that I have, and I don't know how to stretch them, make them last longer, make them pass slower.
After that, what happens?
I'd gladly trade my spot in heaven (to be optimistic) for immortality. Does anyone feel like doing the exchange with me? Despite everything, life does appeal to me. And you can quote me on this.
"Hold on, when you feel like letting go
When you think you've had too much of this life, hang on
Because everybody hurts"
I always hang on and hold on and I always remember that everybody aches, and it helps. But how can I hold on and what do I hold on to when a friend is dying and when the sweetest people leave this world unwillingly?
"Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on....Everybody hurts." - REM
